Many years ago I was confronted head on with this issue. One afternoon I was minding my own busines sitting quietly at my dining room table preparing for a bible study I was teaching when God revealed a deep issue in my own life. There were several things in my heart concerning my husband and as I sat there distracted by my thoughts, I asked the Lord to reveal to me how I should pray for him.
And this is the question (verse) God asked me that day.
Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Luke 6:41
Even as I write that verse out, the memory and the reality of that moment is still very fresh in my mind. I knew that I had spent too much time being irritated by the little specks in my husband's life, while I sat there with this HUGE log in my own eye.
It was a defining moment for me. A deep revelation of the condition of my own heart and life. God began to reveal to me all the things that I had held onto and all the places I had not allowed him to work through because I was too busy noticing all the little things in my husband's life.
Gary Thomas in his book, Sacred Influence shares a story that is a very visual reminder to us all that we should not let the little things that can irritate weigh us down, but instead be thankful for the husband God has blessed us with.
On the first anniversary of the 9/11 attacks, Lisa and I watched several interviews with women widowed as a result of those attacks. "What has changed most about your perspective in the past year?" one interviewer asked. The first widow to respond said, "The thing I can't stand is when I hear wives complain about their husbands." Every woman nodded her head,
and then another widow added, "It would make my day if I walked into the master bathroom and saw the toilet seat left up."
Their words have a profound ring. The little things we allow to annoy us seem trivial compared to the loss of blessings once taken for granted. In the face of their enormous loss, these women no longer cared about the little irritations; instead, they had to face the big, black hole of all that their husbands had done for them, suddenly sucked out of their lives forever. (pg. 49 Sacred Influence)
This morning as I prayed for my husband, I listed all those things that I am so thankful for. I want to focus my heart on these things. I made a list to remind myself. It is amazing how many good things there are if we only would choose to focus our thoughts there.