In the book "Feminine Appeal" again I find her words in the area of tender thoughts so familiar to where I have lived and walked. I quote, "We frequently face situations where we are tempted to think harsh and critical thoughts. Sometimes as wives we are more inclined to concentrate on what our husbands are doing wrong than what they are doing right. We are more aware of their deficiencies than areas where they excel. But if we submit to these temptations, they will only lead to the demise of warm affection." And she goes on to state that this is supported by scripture. Philippians reminds of us that whatever is true, right, noble, pure, lovely, admirable, if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think on these things.
For too long my thoughts focused on what was not right instead of what was good. What a complete waste of time. So much more could of been accomplished if only my thoughts were tender. Tender thoughts is not denying what may be wrong, it is just choosing to look at what is good and trust the Lord for what needs to change.
I remember many years back a time when I turned over these thoughts to the Lord and to my surprise the Lord showed me that while I was trying to remove the splinter from my husband's eye, I had a huge log in my own.
I want to love my husband with tender thoughts throughout the day. I love this quote by Elisabeth Elliot also in the book,
"A wife, if she is very generous, may allow that her husband lives up to perhaps eighty percent of her expectations. There is always the other twenty percent that she would like to change, and she may chip away at it for the whole of their married life without reducing it by very much. She may, on the other hand, simply decide to enjoy the eighty percent, and both of them will be happy."